Jada Pinkett Smith Opens Up To Cookie Magazine

Jada Pinkett Smith opened up to Cookie magazine about how she recently sat down with husband, Will Smith and devised a list of life and partnership goals.

“I’m doing what you might call a business plan in my marriage right now.  I don’t know why, but we all think these things are supposed to be in sync. You know, when you’re in business, you figure out what your goals are, and how you’re going to get all that achieved, right?  Why don’t we do that with our life partners? The point is to clear out a lot of unnecessary stuff so we can find ways of being better together, because your relationship is either moving forward or it’s dying.”

Following are other comments from Jada’s interview found in the November issue of Cookie:

On how similar childhood experiences have helped her and Will stay in tune on raising their children…

“We’re kind of innately in tune with what we both want for the kids.  We knew that part of our partnership would be creating the exact opposite of what we had. We find solutions because that’s what we both want. There is no other option.”

On not wanting her kids to be spoiled brats…

It’s not ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ just ‘because I told you so.’ “I tell them, ‘Every time you go out into the world, you are leaving an impression of yourself and this family with other people. What impression do you want to leave? Do you want people to think you are spoiled [rotten]?’”

On encouraging eight year old daughter, Willow to participate in as many activities as she wants…

“I say to her, ‘Always focus on your own personal strength,’ “As long as you compete with you and stay on the track that you want to be on, you’re going to be okay.”

THIS  IS A LONG ONE. Click on the continue reading link below to see the rest of the interview.

On how a healthy self esteem is ultimately more important than manners and ETTIQTTE …

“I want them to feel good; I want them to smile. Once children feel great about being who they are, you don’t really have to worry about manners.”

On how ‘getting back to nature’ is the primary family goal…

When the going gets rough, instead of just going ‘Argh,’ we sit down and say, ‘We’re going to find a way to do this.’ In this case, I say, ‘Will, you find out exactly where we should go in Yellowstone with the kids, and I’ll do Big Sur.’

On how maintaining a jam-packed schedule results in her overall optimal performance …

“I’ve found that I’m at my best when I [engage] everything—the mind, the spirit, my body.”

ON HER GOLDEN RULES OF PARENTING…

• EAT AS A FAMILY…“There’s flexibility  about when they eat breakfast and lunch, but dinner together is sacred.”
• ENLIST HELP… “I’m lucky to have a lot of people in my world who help me” “She [her mother] travels with me all the time, and when I travel and the kids aren’t with me, she stays with them.”
• DRINK WATER…“I tell them, ‘You have three bottles of water a day, then drink what you want.  I’m always like, ‘Listen, we’ve got to keep our bodies strong—we got too much stuff to do!’ ”
• Respect their boundaries… “Staying out of kids’ space can teach them to be responsible for their own decisions and mistakes. Is it their room, or are they borrowing the space while they’re living in your house? If it’s theirs, then they should be able to do whatever they want with it. If it’s their clothes, they have the right to do whatever they want with those clothes. We have to give them some freedom to be who they are.”
• CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES… “Who is it going to hurt, really, if she has orange balloon pants on the red carpet?” “I try to stay outside my ego and what I want and to respect them as I expect them to respect me.”
• Expose and educate…“We go to church as a family on Sunday, but we study  world religion during the week as well. We read excerpts from the Bible, from hindu texts, Kabbalah, Judaism....”