This girl just can’t get a break! I guess the lesson learned is not everyone is ready to accept Gwyneth Paltrow as a life expert. In fact, doesn’t it seem like most are resenting the change?
Vanity Fair is the latest media mouth to openly mock the actress for her online tip sharing haven, Goop.
Here are a few mock entries they put together.
—– Go ——
I love film. After a yummy meal for the whole family and some truly great friends, we often go out to see something beautiful and unique.
Here’s a tip for all moms. Never ask young children to pay when you go out to the movie theater. It is simply unfair to ask a four-year-old to pay for herself.
Why not give her the trip as a very special present? That way, you-and she-can learn so much more about what it is to love and to give. Repayment can come later.
Next week, we learn to ride a bicycle with a world-expert bicycle nutritionist.
—– Do —–
Many of you have asked if I have any tips on how to get leggings on quicker. My in-house leggings guru advises rubbing onto your legs a paste made from five spoonfuls of extra-virgin olive oil, turbinado sugar, and coarsely ground fair-trade coffee. If you have any further problems, then next week I’ll be recommending a truly great creative-leggings clinic.
Want to see the rest? Click here to visit Vanity Fair.
That made my morning. I laughed so hard at the “War and Peace” one. It really sounds like something that would come out of her brain.
The whole thing was hilarious. You know, I thought Gwyneth was pretty great for a long time. And then she showed the world just how amazingly detached from real life she is. I still like her, but there’s some sort of weird pity attached to it now. “You poor thing, making a turkey sandwich was a major discovery”.
LOL, i think it’s quite funny! I really dislike Gwynneth because she is so self-righteous!
This article came out last week and yes it is funny. I hope it knocks her down a few, she needs a reality check.———
**When there’s no more room in hell, the dead will walk the earth**
I don’t think she is a horrible person for having this website, in comparison to most of Hollywood it’s pretty tame in extreme levels of douchebagery.
I’m glad someone else is taking the Mickey out of Gwyneth, but that was not very funny. :/
Not liking her much, but that was probably too far
I totally agree. There are celebrity Twitter updates that are more pretentious than this. ***annie***
Ba-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
I am glad even Vanity Fair realizes this woman is ridiculous! I welcome practical advice from almost anyone, but most of goop is impractical, time consuming, and expensive. I loved the part about giving the kids to the nanny–priceless!
lol! that’s pretty funny.
Amen! I checked out her website and it had some great ideas, and fun tips. Apparently though I missed the notice to hate her. I can’t like or not like someone who has no relevance in my life.
LOLLLLLLLLLLLLL i think i love vanity fair more now.
her dad filled her head when she was young ; to build her self-esteem. she manifested that QUEEN sheeba sh1t when she grew into her on. that crappy behavior is ALL HER. she made a voice point of saying she was wanting her man(brad pitt); the same man she ridiculed to the point that they broke up; But when he hooks up with one of the most (not so much now because she too is FULL OF HERSELF) beautiful women in the world , GWEN now publicly admitted she made a mistake for leaving Brad. AND THIS IS ALL WHILE NEWLY MARRIED TO ONE OF THE MOST TALENTED AND SEXIEST MAN IN THE (MUSIC) ENTERTAINMENT BUSINESS. You just can’t win with this B1TCHY SCANK. now telling people to donate their kids off to the nanny may be her cute little joke, but to the world shows how self-involved she is.
Very funny and deserved satire. I do not believe in taking pot shots at someone simply because they are famous, but if you take the time to read her interviews you will find her level of self-involvement to be off the charts. Her ego fueled the creation of goop, not the need of friends or the little people. You need to look no further than the names of her children to substantiate the fact that her needs come first. Naming a child apple is all about the parents wanting attention for creating a unique name, not trying to provide a name that has special meaning or pays homage to a relative. R.I.P. and leave us alone gwynnie!
LOL! Damn, even Vanity Fair is slamming this wench.
Hilarious! I laughed tears!