Debra Messing Says Marriage Is “Noble” But Not “‘Til Death Do You Part”

‘Smash’ star Debra Messing opened up to Ladies Home Journal about her split from her husband of 10 years and the challenge of being a working mom. She said it helps her with her role on ‘Smash.’

“I related to how difficult it is to maintain balance on a daily basis. Some days you succeed at it, some days you don’t. And I related to the idea that the show she wrote was kind of a siren’s call. She had promised her husband that she was not going to work while they were trying to adopt a baby, and then she had an idea for a Broadway show. It rang true for me — when an idea comes, you have to follow it.

“The challenge that caused in her marriage was also something I related to, and had experienced myself. Julia has to please her husband, her writing partner, her teenage son, and herself. And isn’t that the challenge of women every day, trying to please everybody? And failing?

“I think the institution of marriage is a noble thing. I think the idea of a partner for life is incredibly romantic. But now we’re living to 100. A hundred years ago, people were dying at age 37. Til death do us part was a much different deal.”

Yet Debra said she and her soon-to-be ex-husband are focused on what’s best for their son. Good for them! Do you agree with what’s implied in her statement about marriage, that it’s not realistic, in this day and age, to think it’s “forever”?

Photos by Claudiorodriguez/FameFlynet




  1. I'm thinking says

    This argument always kind of annoys me. If the goal isn’t lifetime (which I also don’t necessarily agree with) why get married? Just stay together as long as you want. No marriage/no divorce. If you do agree to get married you have promised someone else a lifetime.

  2. Kat says

    I dont think people were intended to be with someone for life! to be happy you need to move on as your personality changes and lifestyles, etc. why stay with someone for life and always have to “work on” the marriage. New romances are so exciting.

  3. Essence says

    Uh…what in the world? Debra Messing is clearly trying to justify the fact that she failed at her marriage. Marriage is not a contract, it is a is PERMANENT. You are supposed to enter into it with both eyes open and prepared to work through your issues. I can’t believe she actually said that…Hollywood is trying to rewrite the whole concept of marriage to make it suite them. The institution of marriage is older than hollywood. You cannot change something just because you failed at it.Rubbish!

  4. Kathy says

    All actors/actresses say this when their marriage fails. They are just trying to save face or whatever. They have to realize marriage isn’t like a sitcom that runs for 5 or 6 years then ends. Kinda funny how 50% of all that marry seem to find a way to make it work, but to hear her talk, you would think everyone is doomed to fail at marriage.
    Hollywood needs to just shut up and sing.