Michelle Duggar has posted a new blog piece that is advice for newlyweds. Honestly, I have NO idea why she decided to write this blog post now, given all the drama surrounding her oldest child, Josh Duggar, and his cheating on Anna Duggar. She’s answering a fan’s question, but I’d have chosen another question ;). I sincerely, seriously hope she’s not sending a subtle message about Anna failing her husband and causing his Ashley Madison hijinks. Anyway, something tells me her advice won’t be shocking to those who followed her on ’19 Kids and Counting.’
Here’s some of what Michelle wrote:
First, I’m going to pass on the advice that was given to me by a dear friend Gala. Whenever I speak with groups of other moms and married women, I always share this advice. It’s been the best advice that was ever given to me in regard to my relationship to my husband Jim Bob.
Gala had only been married for three years, but she had very wise advice. I was about six months out from getting married, and was just all bleary eyed and in love…
She told me: “Michelle, I know you’re so excited. You’re a bride-to-be, but some day you’ll be at this point. I’ve been married three years and I’m still happily married. I have one child, we’re expecting our second and I’m big pregnant. You’ve got to remember this. Anyone can iron Jim Bob’s shirt, anybody can make lunch for him. He can get his lunch somewhere else. But you are the only one who can meet that special need that he has in his life for intimacy. You’re it. You’re the only one. So don’t forget that, that he needs you. So when you are exhausted at the end of the day, maybe from dealing with little ones, and you fall into bed so exhausted at night, don’t forget about him because you and he are the only ones who can have that time together. No one else in the world can meet that need.”
“And so be available, and not just available, but be joyfully available for him. Smile and be willing to say, ‘Yes, sweetie I am here for you,’ no matter what, even though you may be exhausted and big pregnant and you may not feel like he feels. ‘I’m still here for you and I’m going to meet that need because I know it’s a need for you.’ ”
OMG. Again, I really hope Anna isn’t getting the message that Josh cheated because she wasn’t meeting his needs. Even if that’s not the implied message, I don’t know about this. Why are men entitled to sex every single time they want it? Shouldn’t the woman’s needs matter too, especially when she’s “big pregnant”? Isn’t marriage supposed to be about give and take, so sometimes you might be available and sometimes you might just have to say you’re really tired right now? This way of thinking just boggles my mind.
Here are the four points Michelle made:
- Be Available (that’s the “joyfully available” advice written above)
- Talk about disagreements privately
- Get marriage advice when you need it
You can read Michelle’s full post on the Duggar blog. You have to give the Duggars credit: they know how to stay in the public eye despite losing their show!
Photos by FAMEFLYNET