I still feel badly every time I think about this. Remember back in 2003, when Billy Crudup left Mary-Louise Parker, after they had been together for eight years and she was pregnant with their child, to be with Claire Danes? Claire has spoken out about the incident, pointing out that she was 24 at the time and didn’t fully appreciate how people would view the situation. Mary-Louise has kept her silence until now. She addressed the incident in her memoir, ‘Dear Mr. You.’
Mary-Louise doesn’t address Billy by name, but she recounts an incident when she “lost it” with a cab driver while on her way to a doctor’s appointment in a letter called ‘Dear Mr. Cab Driver.’ The cab driver got lost. Mary-Louise wrote that she said:
S–t, goddamn. I mean, why, I mean why the hell-NO! Where are you going now? This is still wrong.”
The cab driver asked her to stop yelling and swearing, but she didn’t, so he finally asked her to get out of his cab, telling her:
I don’t want you anymore.”
Ouch. Talk about a phrase she didn’t need to hear at the time.
Mary-Louise wrote that this was the exchange they had:
No one does
My voice was shot and I barely got out
Look at me
You turned at looked, I think for the first time…
My life is worse than yours in this moment.
I am alone. Look, see? I am pregnant and alone. It hurts to even breathe.
Your hand slowly went to your mouth
I’m trying to get through it but I’m by myself every night and every morning and no one, nothing helps. I’m sorry I yelled. I can’t get my shoes on anymore. Please, I know I am awful, it’s been made clear but look at me please
Look at me.“
I can’t even imagine how she must’ve been feeling at that time. Looking back on the exchange now, Mary-Louise is sorry about what happened. She wrote:
I don’t know what you thought, if you had a daughter or a wife or if my little drama was a hangnail compared to your life. What I wish I could tell you is that I know it may have been. I don’t know what happened to you that morning, or that year, or when you were six. I didn’t know your tragedy or hardship and it was grossly unfair of me to compare my life to yours. I am aware of my good fortune. What I don’t have to struggle for that makes my life easier than most. I have thought of you and know you wouldn’t remember me but I am sorry . . . I realize now that whatever I was walking through was part of my life, one piece of a bigger story that is mostly beautiful.”
It sounds like she has truly gained an amazing perspective on her life, despite the difficult things she’s experienced. Good for her!
Photos by FAMEFLYNET